Let's work together to make empowering changes that will benefit the whole family
Having a child with behavioural issues can have you feeling like you’re failing as a Mum. Some days, it feels like you’re spinning out of control, like the ground your walking on is unstable and it could swallow you up any minute.
Other kids, or maybe even some of your own seem to have ease with life, whilst your other is running riot and loosing the plot more often than seems reasonable. The thought never leaves the back of your mind that maybe something else is going on with them.
Maybe your child already has a diagnosis or maybe the doctor is telling you there’s nothing to worry about. Or maybe you haven’t asked the doctor yet because all of your friends/family are telling you that you’re overreacting and worrying about nothing. But, a mum knows and you can tell that they (and you) are struggling more than most, and you need help.
The meltdowns and outbursts over the smallest things, like putting shoes on or doing their hair, brushing their teeth or getting dressed is a relentless everyday occurrence. It feels impossible to calm them down.
Meal times can be a nightmare too. The things that worked yesterday haven’t worked today, and once again you’ve spent hours preparing wholesome meals for the kids that they haven’t touched!
You don’t like to admit it, but your child rules the house. You may have read all the books or been involved in parenting courses but you still can’t seem to get a handle on their behaviour. You’d like to know what works and have foolproof strategies, because right now, you feel stumped and confused about how to discipline your child.
You go from rage, absolute exasperation and frustration to guilt and self-loathing at least a few times a day.
Then there’s the….
The list goes on…
I’m here to tell you – firstly, trust your intuition mum, you know best!
I’ve been there...
My son was nearly 5 when he was diagnosed with Autism. I had everyone, I mean everyone, kinder teachers, grandma, psyc, friends with kids, friends without kids telling not to worry about it. “He’ll grow out of it”, they said.
You see the thing they didn't understand is that these kids are very clever. They are masters at masking their symptoms. At kinder or school, they go under the radar because their anxiety is so high. They are usually trying very hard to do the right thing and blend in. However, as soon as they are in a safe place (the car, home) they let it all out, and you cop the brunt of their stressful day. All it takes is their sister to look at them the wrong way in the car and they lose it!
They don’t want you to see that they are struggling. They try to hide the stress, anxiety, fear, panic attacks and low self-esteem. These problems don’t go away untreated, and eventually they surface as things like severely challenging behaviour, hyperactivity, avoidance, and missing school, which often leads to exclusion and further isolation, poor self-image, and sometimes much worse.
When my son received his diagnosis, I had mixed feelings. Initially, I felt relieved and justified because I always knew something was different, but at the same time I was sad. The realisation that he would face lifelong struggles was hard to take. I had to grieve. I also had guilt, there were all sorts of thoughts and questions, “did I do something wrong?”, “what could I have done better?”. But, you can’t live your life looking backwards, and you can’t change your genetics, so all that’s left is acceptance.
With my background and the support of others I knew what I had to do. I threw myself into the research, did extra training and undertook mentoring with the best so that he could have the best possible outcome in life.
My son is now living with his condition easily. Most people wouldn’t know that he is has problems, and are often surprised when I tell them he has a diagnosis. Don't get me wrong, we still face challenges like most parents, and at times it feels like his needs for support in social situations and learning may be more than some kids, but overall he is a happy kid with an amazing life.
I believe it is absolutely possible for your child to thrive!
Whether it's stress, anxiety, depression, hyperactivity, digestive complaints, sleep issues or frequent viral infections and cols and flu's. I work closely with a team of professionals to ensure the best therapeutic outcomes, so that your child is happy, healthy, focused.
Being a parent with a challenging child is stressful and it can trigger our own anxieties and needs for control. But, most of all you feel sad because you feel like you are failing them. You worry about their future and don’t want them to struggle in life. You want them to have it better than you did.
Now is the time to gain some control back, not by fighting against it, but by finding empowering ways of working with it and making changes that will benefit the whole family.
Book your FREE discovery session to find out how I can help you and your child.